For as long as I can remember, my goal was to be a professional footballer, my daily schedule would be play football, eat, sleep, repeat.
This passion was so strong that I decided to go for it, take the leap and attempt my dream of playing football for a living. Now, unlike many Hollywood movies with happy endings, things didn’t quite turn out as I planned. Confronted with a nice dose of harsh reality I came to the realisation that I’m just not good enough to make a living from my passion.
The damning truth is that statistically, only 180 of the 1.5 million players who play organised youth football in England will make it as a Premier League professional. That’s a success rate of just 0.12%.
Armed with a BTEC in Sports and pressure from family to sink my teeth into something, I made my attempt at university where things were about to go from bad to worse….
I reluctantly enrolled to study Sports Therapy at UCMK, a new university that hardly had any culture or many students, in the middle of a tiny city where I knew absolutely nobody (Milton Keynes). I would pass my time attempting to attend lectures, training in martial arts, and nurturing my toxic relationship which came to a dramatic end during my time there. Our dynamic had become draining on both of us, where the negative energy was literally sucking me dry, and I just had to make a choice to put my peace of mind first.
To add insult to injury (literally) during the bad break up, I also picked up a knee injury; This meant no more sports. The one thing that was keeping me away from a downward spiral of depression was football, was no longer an option for me. I felt defeated, mentally exhausted and depressed. Finally, enough was enough, I decided that I no longer wanted to waste any more time in Milton Keynes and sure as hell not a single second on my course.
I dropped out, and it really wasn’t as successful as Kanye’s classic album.
In England, one in three 18-year-olds are placed on degree courses through UCAS every year, and this number is rising significantly. In the US, 22.4 million students enrolled for an undergraduate degree in 2017. We have entered an era where EVERYONE seems to be going to university. Being a university dropout made me feel like my options were limited. At the time, I narrowed it down to two choices;
1. Join the army – not quite sure what I would be doing there but it seemed like the only place my skills could be of use, or
2. Accept an apprenticeship at a car rental company in Dubai.
If option 2 strikes you as super random … Dubai was the city I spent a large part of my life and I had family there. So, I decided to choose the latter and head back to the Middle East. Of course, I didn’t want to work at a car rental, but I was certain about staying active and doing something until the next step became clearer.
In middle-eastern culture, dropping out of university gives the impression of a failure in life and socially you might be looked down upon. People would speak about me and say “he’s never going back”, “he will end up becoming a bum”, “how will he even be a man and provide for a family”. However, my confidence in myself allowed me to understand that sometimes, you have to take a step back to take two steps forward. I spent the next two years in Dubai doing that awkward two-step with no rhythm, but I kept going. I was persistent in finding my passion and constantly asking myself; what excites me? what makes me want to get out of bed in the morning? The goal wasn’t necessarily money, sure it would be nice, but I wanted a profession. I needed an anchor.
During my time in Dubai, I worked as a real estate agent, a car salesman, and most excitingly a car park valet where I drove some of the best cars in the world, and felt as if I owned them for those few short minutes.
After a while, friends were graduating and starting their (clearly thought-out) careers, but I still felt stuck: I had spent the last two years trying to figure things out but it felt as though I kept hitting a brick wall. I had a successful family friend that seemed quite happy with his career, so I reached out to seek some valuable advice and mentorship. Sitting down in his fancy office the first thought that crossed my mind is “I need to do what this guy does” – accounting. I’m pretty good with numbers, and the 2 years working made me interested in how businesses operate and how they are sustained.
Jumping onto my laptop, a lot of coffee led to a lot of research on how to become a chartered accountant. The money seemed very attractive, and the career options unlimited…but I still had some doubts. Was a career of crunching numbers even for me? Who knows, but I had already risked everything taking a step back when leaving university and I had nothing to lose in taking another risk. My entrance to this career path was a second attempt at university, I would not only get exemptions for the professional qualification I sought, but also get a degree to keep the family happy and kill two birds with one stone! I finally knew what I wanted. This time I felt more informed and mature, my mind was in a better place to take on whatever life threw at me.
Having a BTEC in Sports didn’t get me university offers for accounting very easily, but London South Bank University gave me a chance and I sure as hell made the most of it. I ended up graduating with a 2:1 degree in Accounting. Looking back, those three years at LSBU were the best of my life. I was enjoying my course as it gave me an in depth understanding of how a business operates, student life couldn’t have been any better due to friends that became family, and I also met the girl that I will soon get engaged to.
I’m not trying to say I’m living the dream of being an accountant, but I’ve found a job that I finally enjoy. It moves me in the right direction whilst consistently providing the funds for me to invest in other ideas that I am passionate about.
The conclusion of my story is two valuable lessons that still help me to this day:
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There is no problem with taking a step back or hitting the reset button in your life. Take the risk, it shapes your character. People can judge you as much as they want, but they aren’t the ones living your life. You are the producer, director and main actor of this movie, so don’t’ fear stepping back to assess your life’s options. I highly recommend reading “The Obstacles is the Way” by Ryan Holiday, it helped me get the right perspective in tough times. Additionally, there are a number of podcasts that continue to teach me lessons, which I believe can be useful to every Bloomer. Try listening to Tim Ferris or Lewis Howes. Nowadays, there are so many virtual mentors that we can have access to and we don’t even have to know them.
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If you don’t know what you want to do in life then stay active until you figure it out. You can’t sit around, because that feeling of waiting without taking any action will suck you in more and more as each day passes. I’ve found a lot of opportunities have presented themselves because I’ve put myself out there and made contacts in jobs and places that weren’t necessarily my dream. My job in event promotion opened the door to my real estate job, and the people I met during my second time at university sent opportunities my way today.
It’s not always easy but the key is to keep the wheels moving and don’t give up on the quest of finding your passion, take advantage of opportunities or put yourself in a position to create them.
Still, we bloom.
